I was on a beach, but underground. I was right where the waves ended their life cycle and I could watch, from underneath the wave, its gentle foam reaching up and spreading over the sand... but the sand wasn't there, but it was there. It was like the beach was made of glass, and I was under it, watching all the goings on under the waves. The sky was deep blue, and I had to stop a moment in my dream and realize just how amazingly beautiful this sight was. How incredibly lucky I was, to see the ocean from this perspective. I could spy on people. Only I could see the beach like this. A man, I only knew from my dreams was there. He was crying, because he wasn't in love with his baby mamma and she didn't see him for what he really was. And somehow I knew I was supposed to restore some form of love back in his life, be it through me, or just helping him.
Patterns. Not just in my dreams, but also in my life. Where the eff do I go from there?
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Adverse.
Do you have those gods (or a god) in your life, that you have an adverse feeling towards? I do. I don't know how to describe it. A rebelliousness, that's it. An uncontrollable rebelliousness. He's popped up in my dreams as of late, after I had acknowledged him during a prayer. I respectfully told him he made me feel like a teenager to a parent, I want to flip him the finger... and tell him he'll have none of me. That I'll do whatever the fuck I want, and he can't have a say in anything.
And there he is, sneaking in my dreams... making me say his name, the fucker! And that strange fury crawls up my spine and inside I scream, "fuck you!" He inspires my Aries urge to fight against everything, indulging in madness and to take another sip of my beer. I feel his laughter as I try to shake it off.
And I've seen him slinking around in the peripherals of my dreams. A large black cat, stalking and lurking in the corners, waiting to rip the flesh from my bone.
They've all been so loud. Words in song change and they speak...
She said to me, "the sea is my church."
And there he is, sneaking in my dreams... making me say his name, the fucker! And that strange fury crawls up my spine and inside I scream, "fuck you!" He inspires my Aries urge to fight against everything, indulging in madness and to take another sip of my beer. I feel his laughter as I try to shake it off.
And I've seen him slinking around in the peripherals of my dreams. A large black cat, stalking and lurking in the corners, waiting to rip the flesh from my bone.
They've all been so loud. Words in song change and they speak...
She said to me, "the sea is my church."
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Bitch Mother.
I have this necklace that I've started wearing since the clasp on my old necklace broke off. It's a silver chain with a small vintage key looped though and nothing more. This key lived on my altar to Hekate for some time. One day, I decided to wear it, as a reminder of Her and to have Her close to my heart. I don't generally wear my jewelry to bed, except for a ring, but I did just a few nights ago... after an emotionally rough evening. After saying my nightly words to Her, lighting Her candles and setting out some incense. I went to bed tearfully with the necklace still around my neck.
It was the first night, in a very long time that I had very symbolic dreams.
I stood in an apple orchard (apples have very much been on the brain these days) and I could see what looked like a large pack of hunting dogs off in the distance. They were running the perimeter of the orchard fence, guarding the boundary. I began to walk into the orchard and in doing so, I seemed to have upset the alpha male. He bellowed and came thundering at me along with a larger darker male dog, who seemed a great deal less harmless than the alpha male. Suddenly, the alpha female (who, in my lucid dreaming brain knew that she was the Mother Bitch, or Bitch Mother) looked me right in the eye and said out loud, "I'm going save you." It was right at that second that the alpha male was breathing down my neck, razor backed and standing on his tiptoes checking me out. I knew he planned to rip me to pieces, but she managed to whine and make all sorts of noise to distract and calm him. When I looked at his body, he wasn't really a hunting dog, but a war dog. His was riddled with scars and he was an old man. The other dog was younger, darker and aloof. The interaction between these three and I is still puzzling. But I think I have a general idea of what was going on and possibly pertaining to my human relationships. Funny that the older one had the war scars and the younger one didn't... Being the younger one in my relationship is actually a veteran of war.
Moving further into the orchard, the apples were strange. They had spines on them, like a pineapple would, but they were still apples. Thorned apples.
The dream morphed and I was elsewhere. I walked by a woman who asked me if I knew tarot, and ask me to be a fellow reader and rootworker for her shop. I declined her.
Funny enough, I walked out onto Cat Yronwodes house, or, her shop. I didn't see her, but I knew this was where she worked. There were honeybees about. They seemed to want to attack me, and I felt like they might, but didn't. They herded me into a wall of trees and brambles. Only one stung me, and she left a large long barb in my right arm.
Ever since I donned that necklace and key, I've been dream walking regularly. My body sleeps, but my spirit walks. I know I'm sleeping, but I know I'm awake - all through the night. So, I suppose this is my cue card to really work this form of travel.
It was the first night, in a very long time that I had very symbolic dreams.
I stood in an apple orchard (apples have very much been on the brain these days) and I could see what looked like a large pack of hunting dogs off in the distance. They were running the perimeter of the orchard fence, guarding the boundary. I began to walk into the orchard and in doing so, I seemed to have upset the alpha male. He bellowed and came thundering at me along with a larger darker male dog, who seemed a great deal less harmless than the alpha male. Suddenly, the alpha female (who, in my lucid dreaming brain knew that she was the Mother Bitch, or Bitch Mother) looked me right in the eye and said out loud, "I'm going save you." It was right at that second that the alpha male was breathing down my neck, razor backed and standing on his tiptoes checking me out. I knew he planned to rip me to pieces, but she managed to whine and make all sorts of noise to distract and calm him. When I looked at his body, he wasn't really a hunting dog, but a war dog. His was riddled with scars and he was an old man. The other dog was younger, darker and aloof. The interaction between these three and I is still puzzling. But I think I have a general idea of what was going on and possibly pertaining to my human relationships. Funny that the older one had the war scars and the younger one didn't... Being the younger one in my relationship is actually a veteran of war.
Moving further into the orchard, the apples were strange. They had spines on them, like a pineapple would, but they were still apples. Thorned apples.
The dream morphed and I was elsewhere. I walked by a woman who asked me if I knew tarot, and ask me to be a fellow reader and rootworker for her shop. I declined her.
Funny enough, I walked out onto Cat Yronwodes house, or, her shop. I didn't see her, but I knew this was where she worked. There were honeybees about. They seemed to want to attack me, and I felt like they might, but didn't. They herded me into a wall of trees and brambles. Only one stung me, and she left a large long barb in my right arm.
Ever since I donned that necklace and key, I've been dream walking regularly. My body sleeps, but my spirit walks. I know I'm sleeping, but I know I'm awake - all through the night. So, I suppose this is my cue card to really work this form of travel.
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